love & friendships

<25, Single, and NIGERIAN

Ok,  let me start by saying this…  Do not feel sorry for me,  I get enough judgment from my elders,  so I know I will get from my peers when I throw myself out there (unless they understand my pseudo struggle).

Maybe I’m picky,  or just scared straight,  but I am like…  Super single. Just go on ahead and slap an “S” on my chest and let the world know because half the Nigerian community back home (in LA) and home home (in naija) know. I get the usual “eehhhhhh our daughter,  when will you bring in your Mrs. Degree?” I wish I had an answer for them,  but I don’t. I’m even beginning to get the question from my pops of life on my love life,  so you know I have to figure something out.

It is not like I do not want to settle down,  because I am trying! I even went out on a date last week (which was awesome by the way),  and even giving online dating a try (I know, who would have thought?! That is for another post), and even try the age old “Nnenna I have someone I want you to meet.” but to no avail.

This unwritten rule that you must be married by 25 is just absurd, because I am still trying to plan to conquer the world – in other words find my true career lol – while men can be 53864929292 years old and not feel the heat of family pressure…  Unfair much?!
But the P R E S S U R E… oh the pressure I get from family,  and the rubbish guys I get that think they are doing me a favour – don’t. Times have changed, sadly, and i firmly believe that men don’t even court women these days because effort is non existent. If I do even meet a guy that is even a third of a man like my pops of life,  I promise this post would be non existent and is vice versa for men and some women these days. To be truly raw and Frank,  half the people I know are in lopsided relationships anyway or one is a liability to the other – I want no parts of that please and no thank you.

So the next time I get a “why are you single” or an “Our daughter you are running out of time o” I will put on my pained smile until Mr. Right catches up to me…  Wherever the heck he is lol.

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Signing off,

Nnennaya|Noir

Uncategorized

Whatever Wednesdays (catch up)

I know I am super behind…  But I do work…  A LOT!  So I do apologize for being behind schedule everyone,  now is catch up time.

Whatever Wednesdays are where anything goes. Questions and topics are brought up by viewers and subscribers and there are no limits. Here is the first topic,  and I truly am curious to know everyone’s thoughts:

Self doubt brings about stagnancy(if that’s an actual word). Most of our self doubt is family induced…especially we women…we are thought to be content with what we have…and not be overachiever so we become stagnant in our position…lacking motivation to think outside the box and reach for goals our men strive to attain

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Is this true?  Sound off!!!  Tell me how you feel!  (I may jump into this one).

Ciao,

Nnennaya|Noir

Random Entry

Whatever Wednesday

Tuesday was to be my supposed Canada trip recap, but I’m having a change of plans and will discuss an incident since I decided to be a geriatric and go to bed hella early 😊 (the fun post will come later it is 4.39am dag nabit lol).

Let me begin with this: if you believe or even try to justify the behaviour of that wannabe top flight security cop,  you might as well exit left and miss me with that BS.  This is in regards to the isolated event that took place at the South Carolina school where the cop used blatant excessive for to remove a student. I am all for discipline, especially when it comes to unruly kids [nothing grinds my gears more than bad ass kids] but this cop was out of line and that is my opinion,  full stop! 
Here is the link to the video and have a look for yourself

Now,  I’m not into CNN (and definitely not into foolish Don Lemon so don’t listen to his arse lol), but this is a KID and that is a grown male, there should be no reason for that kind of force on any student whatsoever.

And if you begin to think with “oh she should have complied” or “she was resisting and that is what happens when you resist” in your head, please explain and discuss this because I am ready…  R E A D Y. 

Ciao,

Nnennaya|Noir

Uncategorized

Monday weekend recap

Let me just say this…  I cannot hang like I use to,  and I definitely hate clubs.  Lol allow me explain:

I worked over 80 hours this week and managed to have my friends talk me into going out whilst only have 3 hours of sleep for the last 3 days and a 6am shift on Sunday. I do not know who I thought I was,  but my body definitely hated me this weekend.  My mental definitely screams “I don’t do clubs” but then the peer pressure comes in,  and I end up getting suited and booted to go and be bored (the pure reality).

I do not know how people go out Every blessed weekend,  but me seeing one gentleman snoozing in the club this passed Saturday had me jumping for joy mentally like “yes!!! I am not the only one”. So if you really ask me what I would like to do for fun,  be prepared to hear me say “I don’t do clubs ♣” I am so done.

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Ciao,
Nnennaya

Nnennaya|Noir

love & friendships

2nd chances…

What constitutes a second chances? What are determining factors for salvaging a relationship? Not limited to romantic relationships, but friendships in general. These are questions I ask myself all the time – Excuse me if I get to deep [my girl Lauryn for the reference lol].

Now I have been through a whole lot of hell growing up, as well as losing many people dear to my heart… Not only physically (to death) but mental separation. I value all my friendships.. As one should, but loyalty is not the same these days romantic relationships and friendships alike. However, humans err and sometimes the thought of returning back to relationships that I have walked away from (believe me… It is never easy) at times cross my mind.

It is in recent events that really kicked my salvaging relationships into over drive… You know… The ones that got away… The ones I ran away from… The friendships I forcefully left behind – all to consider saving some of them.

Now I am not saying to go back to anyone or anything (addictions and Whatnots) that harms you, but if that “what if” comes to mind, maybe you might want to give it a shot. Ego + Pride are the main factors that ruin all relationships, but if you can fix it and both parties are willing then WHY NOT? Do not leave it to tragic events to cause those reasons to salvage memories. Do not leave it.

This is open for discussion (keep it sort of classy lol) what are your determining factors for salvaging relationships? Sound off…
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My Two Kobo,


Nnennaya

Random Entry

Shifting Gears…

After receiving some disheartening news in a span of two days post trip… I am about to get really deep…  And postponing the Canada blog and pics of happiness to discuss something I am all too familiar with – Death.

You would think as many people that I have lost in my life that I would be calloused every time I get bad news of such…  But I do not.  And due to my empathetic nature,  I tend to still that pain when someone I know (even indirectly),  loses a loved one.  Depending on my state of mind, I could just embrace the person… Cry..   Or stand there numb not knowing what to say or do.  One thing is for sure is that ‘I feel your pain’ I totally get it.

It definitely ties into my struggles and conflicts of my faith.  And due to my at times unflattering inquisitive nature I question God; I question him A LOT.

The pain IS Unbearable,  I cannot lie. But you should know that it is OK to crumble…  It is OK to cry…  It is OK to feel that pain,  but do not allow it to consume you to the point where you may go too.  I can leave this advice, find a way to cope, especially when that sadness creeps up on you. It really suxks feeling like life itself has been squeezed out of you as well as draining,  but in due time you have to find solace…  May not be complete solace…  But do find it, and keep it.

Ciao,
Nnennaya

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